1. A Christ-Centered Marriage - A long time ago, this very young couple sat before John Attaway in counseling sessions at Mt. Pleasant Baptist Church. He told us, "if you'll put Christ above each other, always," your marriage will always be blessed. 25 years later, I selfishly think I have the best marriage possible because GOD is in the very midst of our life. When I breathe, He is there with me. He is my rock, He is my shield and He has made the tender strands that bind Kevin and I together become the strong cords that will keep us tethered until one of us joins our Heavenly Father in that beautiful promise.
2. A son with a heart for others - At the 2 year and 8 month mark of our journey as husband and wife, God saw fit to bless us with one of the greatest gifts he gives, a small soul to raise and teach and love. Over the next 22+ years, that little blond headed boy has become all that I had hoped and more. He loves God, he loves his family, he loves Brittany with a love that is beautiful and right, and he loves coaching and he loves children...he shows it each day by patiently teaching 7th graders and trying to make an impact for good on each of their tender lives. I couldn't be more proud.
3. A daughter that can light up a room with her smile and the most beautiful soul you can imagine - After 5 years and 5 months, the prettiest little bundle of joy you can imagine was placed into my arms and I knew that life would never be the same. A baby girl, a toddler son, life was very good. Alexandra changed our household for the good, as she has continued to do for all those in her life for nearly 20 years. If you know her, you love her, and that's the best description I can give you. She brings her smile and kind heart to all she touches. She loves deeply and relies completely on God in all she does. The joy she brings my heart is absolutely indescribable.
4. A golden-locked, perfect baby boy - In April of 1995, I was unexpectedly forced to take a pregnancy test at a doctor's office because I was having an x-ray, and I UNEXPECTEDLY got the surprise of my life, I was EXPECTING a third child. Wow. But God, in his infinite wisdom, gave us the challenges early on, and with his third blessing, delivered to us a child that would spend his entire life serving to please. Carson has quite simply, been an overachiever from day one, (his siblings call him the perfect child). He has an insatiable desire to learn and to improve the lives of those around him. His loves deeply, he cares deeply, and if he is your friend, you are blessed for life. My sweet third baby will forever have his mom's heart.
5. A love for travel - Most who know Kevin and I are probably surprised I'm not sitting on blue water somewhere in the Caribbean. For you know we have become travel bugs over the last 25 years. A Honeymoon cruise started it, and we've never stopped. Together we've seen Germany, Italy, Hawaii, Canada, Mexico, the British and US Virgin Islands, most of the Caribbean, and more than half of the states. They are ALL indescribably beautiful, made more so by spending those cherished days with the love of my life, but, today, I'd rather be right here, cradled by those we love so much to celebrate a life that has been blessed beyond imagination.
6. Friends in Cary/Chapel Hill/Raleigh, Spartanburg and Winston-Salem - We've been blessed to live in three areas (four if you count our month in Summerville) and we've made lifelong friends along the way. We were blessed to have a great reunion with the college crowd earlier this month and it was like a day hadn't passed. Most of them were involved in our wedding day 25 years ago and how awesome it was to get to spend time with them again this month, especially. We have a few couples still in Spartanburg that I could call today and they would be here if I needed them. I will always miss them and those were some of the most special years in our marriage, as we were young marrieds with small babies and those couples were our lifeline while away from family. After 16 years in North Davidson, we feel we are home, amongst all the friends that have become family, watched us raise our children, and been there for us through every celebration, and now, as we have celebrated eternal homecomings of those we love dearly.
7. Speaking of North Davidson, our community is one of the top 25 blessings of 25 years. - Who knew when Kevin got his first job in the area after nearly 9 years in South Carolina, that we would land in the world's best community? Kevin couldn't understand why I wanted to live in Davidson County... but I insisted it was a great school district filled with .... MY FAMILY whom I had been able to visit over the years, but never the chance to live where my parents were raised. I can now say that was one of the top best decisions of our life. Our community plays together, prays together, supports each other, celebrates together, and has left an indelible mark on me that no matter where I go from here, I will ALWAYS love the North Davidson community.
8. My in-laws who I don't consider in-laws - What girl doesn't marry into a family and worry that she will be accepted into her mate's family? Well, I don't have in-laws, I have a second set of parents that have blessed me beyond anything I thought possible at the tender age of 20 when I married their son. Elton and Thelma have been there through every up and every down, faithfully supporting us and modeling the most beautiful marriage for their nearly 57 years together. Every day they are in our lives is another blessing. Thank you for being there for us. We love you. And thank you for sharing Bretta with us. She was an amazing great-grandmother to my kids and the coolest 99 year old I ever knew. I will miss her always.
9. My parents - As I stood there on the steps as the sun had just broken through the rain, on the steps of First Baptist Church in Jonesville, 25 years ago this afternoon, with my arm hooked through his, my dad said, "Are you ready to do this?" knowing that of course I was... he was the one who knew I would marry Kevin before I did. For nearly 46 years, my parents loved each other deeply, and loved us deeply as well. With every child I added, they doted even more. God saw that my dad was tired and his health issues were more than he could bear, and took him home in this, my year of celebration of our 25th year. The last 6 months have not been easy, but knowing where my dad is worthy of a daily celebration. And the blessing of having a mom that still calls daily to check-in on me is priceless. Every day we have her in our lives will be another blessed day in our journey.
10. A sister - Jordan married my brother about 11 years ago, but it feels like she has always been a part of my life. She has a gentle spirit and kind heart and all who know her love her; much like Alex. She loves unconditionally, and is raising two other great blessings in our lives, a niece and a nephew whom I love dearly. She even accepted my brother with ALL of his flaws ( ;P ) and loves him anyway!!
11. And while talking about my dear sister, I must talk about my brother. - I have a brother that will listen, will consider and will love unconditionally, no matter the situation. Chad got all the good qualities of my mom and dad and just makes me happy to be around him. Chad & Jordan are celebrating with us tonight at Chateau Morrisette with the McRaes, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
12. The Lay boys and family - I also married into a family of THREE boys... three Lay boys. Boys that are now (OLD) men with beautiful families that are both reflections of the family man that their dad has been for 57 years. When we get together, it is comfortable, is is fun and it is home. I love to talk with Greg/Bill and listen to his take on every current issue. I love to talk to Anna, my super-smart sis-in-law, that is a dean of social work at USC, and can make any topic interesting. Listening to Steve and Kevin banter back and forth each time we're together, you can see that they enjoy just being around each other. Jolie is like the older sister I never had. She is the calming soul with the great advice always. I have super nieces and nephews that complete our families and bring us all joy.
13. The extended Lay family in Alabama - Although we only get there every other year or so, one of the most looked forward to times in our marriage have been going to see all of Kevin's Alabama family. I love my father-in-law FIERCELY, for his heart is a reflection of my husband's heart... and I see it reflected amongst all of the family in Alabama. For B.J., the patriarch and Kevin's grandfather that we lost in 2012, was an amazing man that raised an amazing family with sweet Mama Jewel. The family loves deeply and are accepting of all that come into the fold, and have taught me many things, especially the importance of each other in our lives. B.J. wrote in a journal every day of his life, and those journals were the prized possessions when he passed. I thought of that when I started this blog this year... and I only got to 8 posts... but he is my hero. Maybe one day....
14. The extended Nifong family - We moved back to North Davidson BECAUSE of the love that I felt my whole life every time we visited my family growing up in Davidson County. To this day, I can show up at any of my aunt and uncles or cousins' homes and they will say, "pull up a chair and talk for a while." I know I am home. And that completes me.
15. Our Fancy Gap home - For the first 15 or 17 years of our marriage, we spent the week after Christmas and July 4th week at my parent's mountain homes. Many good times were spent together and great memories made... and when they sold the last one, my heart broke a little. So we then spent five years or so looking for the perfect place to build memories with our family. We looked forever for the perfect spot where you could see for miles and miles... and when we found it, we put our heart and soul in planning our cabin and planning for many years of family gatherings, memories and togetherness. And for the last four and a half years, we've made memories to last a lifetime already. When I am here, I am truly home. And I thank my incredible husband for catching my vision and letting me run with it. For that, I am forever grateful.
16. Pinedale Christian Church - I'm feeling like I'm being too wordy... so I'll try to be more concise. I can walk through these doors, and feel I am at home. Those I know welcome me and love me as I am, and those I don't know become new friends. The blessings here are too numerous to count, and this place and the people behind the doors have shaped the entire lives of my children and my family. The families of our ministers, the McKenzies, Sinks, Earharts, Hausers, Maurers, Marks, Lewis, and now Martin & Ryan... wow, no words. Thank you God, for bringing us to this place.
17. Our friends - I could be so wordy here you would quit reading now. So many families have come in and out of our lives and left their footprints there. You know who you are... your last names are Mustin, McRae, Mukamal, Blue, Rose, Johanec, Barbour, Nifong, Shumate, Lilly, Strickland, Smith, Cockerham, Tester, McCormick, Gillespie, Hucks, Morgan, Day, Andrews, Wilson, Darrow, Cook, Nicholson, Vest, Kahl, Fashimpaur, Johnston, Pack, Sutor, Fishel, Sain, Hall, and many, many others that I should have typed, but remember, I have half-Heimers at the 25 year point and sometimes my memory just stinks. You have all been there in the good times and the bad and I will forever be grateful for all of you and all you have meant to us in these 25 years.
18. Morningside Baptist Church - This place welcomed in this newlywed couple way back in 1989, and made us feel at home. We fell in love with the ministers, the McGhees, who have now been home with the Lord for years... they became second grandparents to us. We loved David, our choir director who could will forever live in my memories at Christmas every time I hear "Oh Holy Night," and we loved Jackie, our choir director, who became one of my all time favorite people and who I LOVED when she became a second mom figure to me while I was raising babies. And Dr. Kirk Neely became the steady, thoughtful man of God at the helm that I still admire to this day, and love to read his posts.
19. North Davidson schools and our preschools - Northwest Elementary, North Davidson Middle and High Schools; Montessori in Spartanburg and Midway Methodist - Yes, I know many people feel strongly about the actual schools, but I'm talking mostly about the people. The PEOPLE who touched my children's lives and shaped them, who spent hours teaching them and loving them. I'll always remember Mr. Carpenter, best principal ever. We came to love Mrs. Kiger and then really respected Mr. Fishel. The teachers are too numerous to name, but some that stand out are Decker, Caldwell, Patterson, Sink, Boyles, Robbins, Sanders, Allen, Proctor (s), Vaughn, Nazarro, Greene, Daniels, Hodge, Woosley, Israel, Redmond, Truell, Brinkley, Primiano, Piatkowski(s), Fordham, Holcomb, Burcham, Crotts, etc. SO MANY GOOD TEACHERS that made a difference for my little starfish. For the preschool years, it's been so many years that some of the names escape me, but the way they made us feel does not. These two schools readied my kiddos for "big school" and loved them and I remember being so very proud at each little performance and every time they sang and our kids thought they were "so big." Our years at each of these are remembered with fondness and wonderful memories. Mrs. Sally McNabb... I will never forget that name, as I'm sure Andrew will not ever. What a gifted and PATIENT woman. ;)
20. Real Estate Career and Kevin's job - Eight years ago I found a family of people that I really enjoy working with... Carol Hudson and Jodi Tate made a huge difference in my life by encouraging me and teaching me to love real estate. It is there that I have found a true career that has both helped to support my family and allowed us to live a life we love. I am forever thankful to those who have been there along the way... Renea, Josh, John Mc, Lili, Carol, Jodi, Beverly, John H, Lisa, Chris, Cathy, Terri, Vicki, Jim, Sharon and so many others.... you know who you are. Just thank you. I am also truly appreciative to all the clients that have come through my life. You have enriched me! And to all those we've come to know and love through BGF, it has been a pleasure. You keep my husband happy, busy, productive and fulfilled, and that's so important.
21. Out of the Box - In our recent four years, we've found a church home when we are in Fancy Gap... we ride the country road up to Hillsville and worship with our little small church that brings a smile to my face as soon as we drive up. The message is real, the people are kind, the minister, Ronnie Collins, makes all feel welcome, his family is AWESOME, and the music is fantastic. This place makes me happy and feel close to God... simple as that.
22. WBFJ and WLFJ - The Christian stations in Winston-Salem and Spartanburg... why a radio station you ask? Because music shapes my life and the message playing at these stations has accompanied me along my journey and started and ended my day where I need to be so often. To those great people, like Wally Decker and Bonnie Hilton, who have made this their passion and life's work, I thank you. Because some of my favorite memories are Friday mornings singing the birthday song with my young children on the drive to school each week.... priceless.
23. Troop 238 - As I prepare for Carson's Eagle Scout Ceremony, I have been thinking about the DOZEN years my family has spent with this Troop. We are definitely the family that has been involved the longest and there are SO MANY MEMORIES that are held for all THREE of my boys, Kevin included. Cherokee, camping, ski trips, battleships, beach trips, etc.... For all those that have played a part, Kight, Weber, Tucker, Pack, Crotts, Jarvis, Wooten, Waisner, Jones, Dempsey, Barringer, Newman, etc.... thank you. Thank you for shaping my boys from kids into men. Into Eagles.... once an Eagle, always an Eagle.
24. Brittany Hall - On a fall day in 2009, I moved my boy into Appalachian State University and that day he met a beautiful blond girl with a heart of gold. By Christmas, I knew what he did not... that he was crazy over this girl. By spring, she became his girlfriend. After a Christmas trip that December in 2010, I knew she was his forever girl. One day soon, I hope to watch her walk down the aisle into our family forever because she has already become my second daughter, my own daughter's best friend, and... become the one closest to my Andrew's heart. She will always be one of my children. (And she's about to be a Doctor too... so proud)! It's exciting for Kevin and I to grow our hearts and include more kids. Can't wait to see what the future holds with these two.
25. Jeremy Baker - As my daughter was finishing her sophomore year of high school, she started talking a lot with one of her good friends... and I could see the mutual admiration blossoming. I respected this young man for who he was, a quiet non-assuming young man with a heart for Jesus, a love for music and a people pleaser. Everyone who knew him told us what a gem he was... and the perfect one for my daughter. Since that day, until this one three and a half years later, he has made my girl happy. And that is what is important. He is there for her, he loves her unconditionally, and all I can say is I can't wait to see what the next couple of years hold for these two as they finish college and perhaps begin a life together.
Whew.... that's a long list. There are many other things I could include, but these are 25.... for our 25 year journey. And I've spent each day of the walk beside the man that completes me... that loves me unconditionally, that puts me first over everything and everyone but Christ, who we put at the center. He wakes up and lives the book, "The Five Love Languages." He learned mine early on and he lives to speak mine. He is the most incredible father to my kids and he has modeled the Christian father and husband for them so that I know will also be the kind of man he has been. I hope I have done the same for Alexandra. We have been blessed in this journey immeasurably, and I hope to be blessed with at least 25 more or even 50. Thank you, Kevin Lay, for picking me, for making this incredible life. I will love you forever. Thank you, Lord, for these.
